Wednesday, 23 October 2013


Dried and broken

In response to Hugh Garner’s “The Sound of Hollyhocks”


So brilliant yet fleeting

Full of promise and hope

He was recovering, he was

And yet, he hung from the rope

 

He whispered to the flowers

The flowers whispered back

Telling stories only they knew

Giving support that he lacked

 

He talked of a wife he cherished

But now she is gone

By the roadside, she perished

The caged polar bear was despairing and forlorn

 

In came the mother

Who wanted control

She wanted to fix everything

She wanted her little boy home

 

But he did not want that

He could not bear the thought

So he drew his last breath

And his roommate soon forgot

4 comments:

  1. Your use of vocabulary, and the description are really awesome! The poem runs smoothly. I like how you wrote your poem from the perspective of a third person, who seemed to be witnessing everything that had happened in the short story. Your poem is really unique. Excellent work!
    W.S XD

    ReplyDelete
  2. Great work Beverly! :D I like about how you depict the whole story using neat, simple yet effective phrases. It really sets the scene and mood. I especially like the line that says the caged polar bear was desparing and forlorn. Also, I am really impressed knowing that you wrote this in such a quick time and that you even made the poem rhymes~ :)
    -J.H.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow, this is a very good poem! The words and phrases that you use are incredibly good. The poem is concise and it describes the scene well. I am stunned.

    H.H

    ReplyDelete